When the Wind Blows

“In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on.” ~ Robert Frost


When I was a young girl, I found it mind-boggling how older people never seemed to really worry about anything. As for any teenager worth her salt, a small stumble was enough to devastate my world.

One day, one of my mother’s friends came over to see us. She looked terrible – her face was etched with deep lines of worry, and her eyes lacked the spark I was accustomed to see in them. She strangely looked like an old lady, and only bore a slight resemblance to the vibrant woman I knew. I said hello and gave her a hug before she and my mother went to the kitchen and closed the door; she held me tight, as if she never wanted to let go, yet her embrace felt weak. I said nothing. As curious as I was to know what had happened, I found comfort in my ignorance, afraid that whatever had affected her so deeply could possibly crack the foundations of my own world.

After her friend left, my mother explained that her husband had passed away in a traffic accident, and she was left alone taking care of her two young sons; if that wasn’t enough, one of the children was dealing with a serious health issue and required extra care which prevented her from working full time. To my teenage mindset, such hardship was something that could only fit a movie script – how could anyone survive so much?

A few months passed, and I met my mother’s friend again. This time she looked much stronger, and although one could still detect sadness in her eyes, she promptly smiled when she saw me. The moment her first few words escaped her lips I was in awe – her voice had a newfound strength, and a sense of deep personal resolve. When I told her how sorry I was for her loss, and asked how she was coping with her son’s medical issues, she smiled genuinely and replied: “He is fine. Things have been hard, but if one can hang on to the rope while the wind is blowing, their feet will find stable ground to stand on again. Everything passes.”

I thought of her words on the way home – what exactly did she mean?

It took many years for the depth of her message to sink in. Over time, I’ve run into situations in which I had to “hang on to the rope,” when things and energies got so crazy and scattered that I wasn’t sure what the outcome would be. Yet, I survived; each and every time. So did other people I know who lived through trying events.

In the greater scheme of things, much of the hardship we go through on a daily basis is no more than a speck of dust in a ray of sunshine, but as we go through it, it feels like a boulder chasing us. It’s not until things have passed and we are able to assess them from a distance that we realize the sun never stopped rising and setting, and life continued on, unscathed and self-preserving. If I look back now at some of my less-than-happy moments in the past, I can see that no matter how devastating or filled with anxiety they were, they did finally settle, and things found a way to smooth themselves.

Today, I no longer worry much. After all, if something is meant to go wrong, I will have plenty of time to worry over a disastrous outcome IF and when it happens; no sense in wasting energy over it ahead of time.

Things happen, and sometimes their play is entirely out of our control; some are apparently beneficial, while others seem placed on our path to hinder our growth, but all of them will eventually pass. And sometimes we realize that we worried too much after all.

The Value of Hardship

“It is not good for all our wishes to be filled; through sickness we recognize the value of health; through evil, the value of good; through hunger, the value of food; through exertion, the value of rest.” ~ Greek Proverb


As I sat down to dinner, last night, my mouth watered the moment I laid eyes on the small feast set in front of me – spicy pork tenderloin with vegetables and a side of roasted potatoes, followed by a generous bowl of strawberries and freshly whipped cream. Having been extremely busy most of the day, food had been the last priority on my list, and by the time I finally sat down I was famished.

The moment I took the first bite, I almost shivered from the incredible sense of pleasure that cursed through my body. I ate the first few forkfuls with ravenous enthusiasm, deeply appreciating the full, bodacious flavors coming together in a perfect culinary marriage.

By the time I consumed the main course, most of the appreciation was gone with the hunger; when I finally finished my bowl of strawberries and cream, I was so full I couldn’t even entertain the thought of another bite. The feeling of hunger I had experienced prior to dinner was uncomfortable and making me feel edgy, yet it was the powerful force which triggered the heightened pleasure I felt when I got the opportunity to taste my meal.

Discomfort and lack, although undesirable, allow us the chance to appreciate comfort and abundance. I remember thinking about this concept a year ago, when I suffered from a pinched nerve in my neck. I could not turn my head, and every movement caused excruciating pain. I would have given anything in that moment to feel better; yet, when I am normally free of pain, that sense of wellbeing is taken for granted.

As humans we take everything for granted – our ability to move, to communicate, of being free from pain, hunger and oppression; quite often, we take love and life for granted.

Life storms give us the opportunity to appreciate the sunny days. When the sun shines for too long we become bored with it and no longer appreciate its warmth, but after a week of constant rain, nothing feels better than a bright blue sky.

While I cleaned the kitchen after dinner, I suddenly felt elated and grateful, not just for my blessings, but also for my woes, for if I never experienced hardship I would also never experience the deep pleasure that comes when good things finally manifest.

An Act of Random Kindness

"You and I can never do a kindness too soon, for we never know how soon it will be too late." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson


It’s amazing how much one can observe and learn even from a run at the grocery store. As I waited to pay for my purchases, yesterday, I noticed that the first person in line was rummaging furiously through the contents in her purse. Stress was evident on her face, and I wondered if she had just realized she had forgotten her wallet.

She looked up at the cashier and seemed ready to cry. She turned toward the two plastic bags containing the few items she had picked up and began to take out some things, mentally adding up what she had to leave behind. When I saw what she had pulled out, my heart sank – a package of store brand ham, cereal, ground beef and a bottle of juice. She held on to two loaves of bread, milk and diapers. She hadn’t forgotten her wallet – she simply didn’t have enough money even for basic necessities and was looking for a miracle at the bottom of her purse.

I immediately dunk my hand into my own to grab my debit card, but the man in front of me beat me to it. He gave the cashier enough money for the entire bill and seemed almost embarrassed that his act of kindness had been a public one.

The woman was stunned at his generosity. She looked up at the man with tear-filled eyes and thanked him. What happened next, however, was the highlight of it all.

He nodded, and told the lady that his best friend had recently taken his own life because no one had realized in time he needed help. His eyes moistened and his voice broke for a moment as he told her to not lose faith because things will eventually turn around. She instinctually hugged him, and a single tear escaped her eyelids. After that, she left. He paid for his deli sandwich and soda, and exited the store quietly.

I watched them both go, and thought about how many times I have probably passed by someone who is silently suffering and didn’t know it. All the anonymous faces inside the store – each with a story of their own, and some bearing crosses.

I thought about the times I could have smiled at a stranger, or helped someone with a small act of kindness, rather than just cross paths with them and look ahead. Any of them could have been the man whose heart was broken, or the lady who didn’t have enough money to buy juice for her children; maybe, they could have been someone whose spouse had recently passed away, or even someone who had lost all hope of ever overcoming hardship.

Truth is, we don’t know the person behind the façade, and we don’t know of their situations and their struggles. Because of that, we should always strive toward being kind to one another. Maybe then, so many would not feel completely lost and alone.

Holding on to Faith

Last night I had a strange dream. I was driving down some unknown road, and suddenly I came upon a road block. I got out of the car to see what the problem was, and saw a table set up on the side of the road, with a small fish bowl in the middle. Inside the bowl the water was very murky, but a small orange goldfish was still alive in it. It looked undernourished, but very much alive. When I picked up the bowl, the fish flipped and almost came out of the water, so I ran to get some fresher water and some food for him. I figured it would take some time to bring the tiny creature back to its prime, but with good food, a little TLC and the appropriate amount of time everything would be alright.
Then I woke up. I lied in bed awake for a while, wondering what on God’s green earth the dream was about. I began to speculate what the fish might symbolize for me, and why the little fellow was stuck in such a bad place, not conducive to its growth.
I thought about faith. Could it be it? Has my faith faltered during this time of hardship for our country? Maybe a little.
I was raised to be very driven by the power of Spirit, and have always felt reassured that things will, somehow, work themselves out.
I think lately, as many others have, I have been unknowingly thrust into the vacuum of anxiety which has enshrouded our world. Not entirely, mind you, but I have found myself wondering what will happen. I think that all the hatred spewed around the political race, the failing economic situation and the general anxiety which has greatly been exploited by the media have taken a toll on most of us.
I woke up this morning with a different type of resolve: I am claiming back my full faith. No longer will I get wrapped into the ugliness of things, if I can help it, and I will once again “know” that everything is going to be alright. Somehow, things will find the path to straighten up, and all the pieces of the puzzle will fall into place.
I don’t believe in coincidences, and know that everything happens for a reason. We have come to associate our self-worth to material possessions, but have now come to a crossroad where we need, once again, to shed that notion.
Spirit is known by many names, depending on the tradition one follows, but the essence of It remains the same. Spirit is ever present to hold our hand and lead us out of the dark cave we have, halfway consciously, trapped ourselves into.
We will survive the hardship and, because of it, we will be better people. We only need to believe and reach out to one another, rather than isolating ourselves. We just need to nourish our faith a little more, and fish it back out of the murky water it has survived into.