Monday, March 23, 2009

It's His Fault!

“You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of.”~ Jim Rohn

There are many times in the life of a mother when she wants to look at her children and lovingly say “I told you so.” Yesterday was one of those fatidic moments for me.

We have recently adopted a kitten, and although I have repeatedly told my daughter that the kitten is not a toy - and should only be picked up occasionally - my opinion in the matter seem to quickly evaporate the moment the words escape my lips.

Yesterday morning, she was on a mission to get the cat to sit on the counter beside one of her stuffed animals; when she put him down, the kitten tried to escape and she grabbed him quickly – too quickly.

The cat slipped off the counter and instinctually tried to hold on to anything he could as he fell. Unfortunately for her, Morgan happened to be the only thing in his way before he reached the floor.

The result was a deep gash on her hand, as the kitten’s claws dug into her skin and ripped a four-inch path on it. Of course, Morgan could not see her part of responsibility in the unfolding of the situation that had just occurred. According to her, the kitten – who had been until five minutes before the sweetest cat on earth – was now “stupid” and had hurt her on purpose. Although I tried to explain that the kitten had scratched her by accident as he was falling, she would hear no reasons.

More often than not, many of us entirely blame others when something happens, even when we are partly at fault. It is easier to get angry at someone else than it is to get angry at ourselves, regardless of the fact that we might have facilitated the process, if only by enabling the actions of others.

By assuming responsibility for our part, we fear the spotlight of judgment will instantly shine on us, and expose our weaknesses for all to see. Yet, self-accountability is necessary if one hopes to break the chain. Without accepting that a change of perception is needed within ourselves, we will continue to walk blindly into the same mistakes, and will perpetually stumble into the very same rocks we tripped on before.

Each time we point a finger at someone, it wouldn’t hurt to acknowledge that the rest of them are pointing back to ourselves.

No comments: