Monday, November 30, 2009

“Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, Old Time is still a-flying; And this same flower that smiles today, Tomorrow will be dying.” ~ Robert Herrick


A few days ago I went to the post office with my five-year-old daughter. While we stood in line, she talked non-stop, her little voice filling in the pockets of silence so common in an adult setting. A gentleman in front of us seemed particularly amused by her constant chatter, and turned several times to kindly smile at her; his approval infused her with even more energy – if that’s indeed possible – and she talked about everything, from Santa Claus to the playground at the park, and even about her doll that doesn’t cry anymore because she fed it too much water. She patiently waited by my side, but could not stand still for more than a couple of seconds; one or more parts of her tiny body were constantly moving, energized by the quick silver of youth.

In contrast, the gentleman in front of us appeared tired. He stood without complaining, but it was painfully obvious that he was uncomfortable. Yet, his face was kind and his smile gentle, acceptance and appreciation gracefully etched in the lines of his face.

My gaze darted back and forth from my daughter to the old gentleman several times. In front of me was the human equivalent of a day in time – my daughter was the passion and fire of sunrise, the boundless energy and hope of a new day; the kind gentleman was the sunset, with his composed and gentle energy, able to paint everything with the breathtaking colors of knowledge and wisdom accumulated throughout the day. He lacked the powerful energy of sunrise, but his gift was one of acceptance of all that can’t be changed.

And here I stood in the middle, my own presence that of midday. I realized then that I don’t have the unspoiled energy of sunrise, nor do I have the peaceful wisdom of a beautiful sunset, but I do stand on a platform between the two – I still have the energy to change things I don’t appreciate in my world, and the ability to focus on goals that are important to me. Standing in the middle of the path, I have learned that some things should just be embraced for what they are, positive or negative, while some others are still worth fighting for. I have accepted that I can’t change the world, but I am in charge of fostering my own happiness. I no longer care much about petty behaviors and superficial rewards, yet I start each day with the unbridled hope of a child on Christmas Eve.

I wondered if the old gentleman’s thoughts floated anywhere along the same lines as he watched us, two generations eagerly walking the footsteps he left behind. I wondered if he had any regrets, or any dreams he hadn’t been able to fulfill which he had stored into a drawer of his soul. Watching him filled me with resolve – why wait until tomorrow to do something about today? As Mother Teresa so wisely said: “Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.”

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Thank You














Good morning everybody!

Last night I shared an early Thanksgiving meal with my family, and I thought of all the wonderful people who have crossed my life this past couple of years. As I went through the list, I was happy and proud to realize that I wouldn't be so blessed without your support. You guys have stuck with me and encouraged my writing, and indirectly you have made my greatest, life-long dream come true.

I will not be blogging this coming week as I'm trying to wrap up two small projects I've been working on, but before I go I would like to share a video with you which expresses exactly how I feel. Again, thank you for all the love and support; I don't know if I'd be where I am without you...:)

Please click on this link to watch the video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qHVLPe_uPA4 and have a wonderful Thanksgiving. I will "see" you back next Monday.

Friday, November 20, 2009

The Twelve Days of Thanksgiving

Good morning everybody!

Since I was busy last night, and didn’t get the chance to write anything new, I thought of posting something really cute that someone sent me last Thanksgiving. I don’t know who the author is, but it might just start your day with a smile…

“The Twelve Days of Thanksgiving” ~ Author unknown

On the First Day.....
We give thanks for the fresh turkey feast and its hot trimmings.

On the Second Day.....
We bless the cold turkey sandwiches, sloshy cranberry sauce, and hard rolls.

On the Third Day.....
We praise the turkey pie and vintage mixed veggies.

On the Fourth Day.....
We thank the pilgrims for not serving bison that first time, or we'd be celebrating Thanksgiving until April.

On the Fifth Day.....
We gobble up cubed bird casserole and pray for a glimpse of a naked turkey carcass.

On the Sixth Day.....
We show gratitude (sort of) to the creative cook who slings cashews at the turkey and calls it Oriental.

On the Seventh Day.....
We forgive our forefathers and pass the turkey-nugget pizza.

On the Eighth Day.....
The word ''vegetarian'' keeps popping into our heads.

On the Ninth Day.....
We check our hair to make sure we're not beginning to sprout feathers.

On the Tenth Day.....
We hope that the wing meat kabobs catch fire under the broiler.

On the Eleventh Day.....
We smile over the creamed gizzard because the thigh bones are in sight.

On the Twelfth Day.....
We apologize for running out of turkey leftovers. And everybody says, "Amen!"

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Colors of the World (repost)

When you look at it in a mean way, how mean it is! When you look at it selfishly, how selfish it is! But when you look at it in a broad, generous, friendly spirit, what wonderful people you find in it.~ Horace Rutledge

I always find it interesting that my husband and I can meet the same people and have an entirely different impression of them. Similarly, our views of current events are also very conflicting at times.

My husband sees the world as a hostile environment, where ruthless people are consistently arranging their days around taking advantage of others. He is a news addict, and will – after a day of stress and countless exchanges – use his entire evening to hear more and more distressing segments, nodding his head when someone makes a statement of impending doom.

I am the opposite side of the coin. I peruse the paper every morning but focus mostly on the positive news. I don’t believe we live in a perfect world, but I don’t believe our world is all that bad either. We have conflicts, hardship and everyday obstacles, but so has had every generation before us.

I don’t believe people are any worse today than they were yesterday; we are simply more aware of events and heinous acts because of the advent of widespread media. I don’t think there are more child molesters loose on the streets; the only difference between yesterday and today is that in the old days we didn’t know of a child who had been kidnapped three states away, and victims were more reticent to come forth and point a finger at their abusers; dirty laundry was, more or less, washed at home.

It is human nature to be fearful and doubtful. It is also another human flaw to be easily influenced by negative suggestions. Since childhood we are conditioned to be afraid and careful. Germs will hurt us; friends have a double agenda; strangers will kill us; very few caregivers ever explain to children that stress and fear make us sick worse than germs, most friends don’t have hidden plans, and the majority of strangers will only kill us with a smile. Personally, I refuse to live in a world where I have to feel fearful and defensive at all times. I do believe in destiny, and I think that if something is meant to happen to me, it will happen regardless of how paranoid or relaxed I am.

Everything in our world is dual; we can choose to look at one face of it or the other. Electricity can warm us and provide light, but can also be used to electrocute; water is healing and soothing but can also be employed to drown someone; fire is warm and inviting but can also char everything on its path; air can be uplifting and wind relaxing, yet it can carry a blaze across forested areas.

There are always two ways to look at the same thing; it is up to us to decide which color of lens we choose to wear when we take a look around.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

The Sad Cashier


“Love me when I least deserve it, because that’s when I really need it.” ~ Swedish proverb.

Just a few days ago, I went to a store and waited in line while the cashier took care of the long line of people in front of me. Even as I leafed through a magazine to pass time, I couldn’t help noticing with the corner of my eye that the cashier was edgy and seemed to be absent-minded.

I heard a couple of snappy comments directed at her, so I put down the magazine and just watched. Oblivious to the negative vibe she was quite clearly fostering around her, the cashier continued to scan items, any trace of a smile as absent from her face as sunlight on Pluto.

When my turn finally came, I put my items on the counter and watched the cashier more closely. She scanned a couple of things and looked at her wrist watch before grabbing a few more items; the pattern repeated a few times, and the anxiety on her face seemed to grow by the minute.

My first assumption was that she was eager to finish her shift, but on second thought she seemed too edgy for that to be the only reason for her scattered behavior, so I simply smiled at her and asked her if she was okay. She looked up, smiled sadly and said that she was fine but was worried about a close member of her family who was undergoing surgery at that moment. I told her I was sorry to hear and she replied that she was waiting for a phone call to confirm that the surgery had gone well.

I tried to fit her shoes for a moment, and wondered how I would feel in her position – certainly just as edgy. I thought back about the people who had shown obvious reproach at her behavior and realized then how often most of us jump to conclusions without knowing the facts. I asked the girl if she wanted to go ahead and call her family while I was there, using the excuse of a price check. She declined my offer, but the smile on her face was one of relief – although she was still worried, the fact alone of being able to voice out her worries with someone immediately lifted her spirits. I wished her loved one a speedy recovery on my way out and left the store.

We rarely know what’s going on in the lives of those we cross paths with every day. We set certain standards in our minds, and frown if the person we meet falls short of our expectations; this individual could have a thousand and one reasons to act a certain way, but, unwilling as we are to give anyone the benefit of the doubt, we judge their situations and make unfounded assumptions.

Reaching out to others is certainly more productive than lashing out at them. The reward we receive is undoubtedly greater, and it is worth the few extra seconds we have chosen to invest.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The Two Wolves

While many of us remained painfully glued to TV screens as Shaniya Davis’s body finally surfaced, the minds of most struggled to wrap around whatever could have possibly motivated her mother to open the door to such evil. A short story came to mind, one I read a long time ago which always stuck with me. I don’t suppose anyone has any doubts as to which wolf Shaniya’s mother fed.

“An old Cherokee man went walking in the mountains with his grandson. They sat on a rock and observed a pack of wolves in the distance.

The old man told his grandson: “Do you see those wolves over there?”

When the young man nodded, the old Cherokee continued. “At all times, there are two wolves living inside each of us. One is greedy, aggressive, envious, fearful and confrontational. The other is gentle, nurturing, embracing, trusting, peaceful and humble. The two are at odds with each other and fight incessantly.”

The young man remained silent and continued to stare at the wolves in the distance; then he turned toward his grandfather and said: “Which of the two wolves survives the fight and lives?”

The old Cherokee man replied: “The one you feed”.”

It is too late for Shaniya, but it is not late for each of us to take a moment and look within our own lives to see what type of feelings we allow our energy to feed. Change does begin with ourselves and ripples outward toward the rest of the world, touching and empowering other lives as it moves.

Monday, November 16, 2009

The Sweetest Revenge

“The best revenge is massive success.” ~ Frank Sinatra


Throughout the years, I’ve met many people; many of them have survived some kind of abuse. Interestingly enough, after they were no longer abused by others, they picked up where others left off, and violated themselves even worse than any of their oppressors ever did.

It is not uncommon for victims of abuse – physical, verbal or mental – to self-sabotage. Going into the trigger mechanisms of such a response would indeed require a much longer discussion than what can be afforded in a blog post, as would the analysis of each unique type of response, but we can safely assess that most individuals who have suffered an emotional trauma as a consequence of abuse tend to indulge in behaviors which validate the actions of the abusers rather than dispelling them.

Let’s assume, for example, that someone was repeatedly told they could not amount to anything in life, and they were led to believe that their actions were a ticket straight to hell. In many cases, they had probably felt incapable and smothered at every corner. Let’s say, now, that this individual is finally free – at least physically – from the person who abused them. The first thing they would probably do, the moment they are able to control their own lives, is to indulge in the very same behaviors their abuser used as ammunition to gain control over them.

By continuing the abuse that others had begun, we only validate the faulty perception they have of us. No matter what happened, we don’t need to let the abuse go any further, especially if we are now the ones in the driver’s seat. If someone never believed we could amount to anything, and we turn their vision into reality, we choose to give them more power than they were ever entitled to have. If, instead, we focus on cracking their assumption, and we direct our energies to shifting the sail toward a positive current, we have instantly broken the drama and won the battle.

Nobody ever said that revenge must walk a rocky trail. Skipping over the rocks that were placed on our path to make us fall is the best way to show the world that we are finally free from the chains of the past.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Holiday Blues


When we think of holidays, the first thing that comes to mind is the time we will spend with our loved ones, but what happens when our loved ones are no longer there to share the cheer? As happy and cheerful as the holiday season is for some, it is probably the hardest time of year for those who have lost someone they love.

Several years ago – when I first moved to the US, far away from most I hold dear – a friend gave me a small book entitled “There’s No Such Place As Far Away” by Richard Bach. I didn’t touch it for a while; then, one morning, as I was sitting alone in my empty apartment, feeling alone and disconnected from everyone, I picked the little book up and began to read. It was the story of a little boy who had moved really far away from his best friend. On the day of his friend’s birthday he wanted to celebrate with him, and the pain he felt in his heart, being so far away, was overwhelming and unbearable. He asked several birds if they could help him get to his friend’s house, and all of them told him they were too small to carry him or they had other things to do. Finally, a wise bird told the little boy: “If you truly love your friend, aren’t you already there with him? The only thing that separates you from him is space, and space is never larger than love.” The little boy thought about it for a while, then realized the bird was right. His friend loved him, and knew he was loved back; most of all, his friend would not want him to be sad on such a special day; the best thing the little boy could do would be to look in his heart and find the joy his friend’s birthday brought to him, whether they could spend it together or not. So the little boy went on about his day, wishing his friend a happy birthday and knowing that, even if they were apart, their memories joined them forever.

True love and friendship cannot be cut short by boundaries of time, space or form. When we truly love someone, we can still be with them through the power of the memories built together and know they will never leave us, as the sound of their voice will forever echo through the walls of our hearts.

Our loved ones would not want to see us unhappy; although they crossed over and shed their outer shell, their true essence is still with us, and the love they felt for us is still alive. Rather than feeling guilty or empty at the thought of celebrating a special day without them, we should make it a point to celebrate it in their honor. A Christmas song, or a Thanksgiving meal, should not be daggers in the heart, but chances to reminisce the happy moments we spent with our loved ones while they were still with us; a beautiful array of decorations should not feel like an insult to our grief, but remind us of the times we decked the halls together.

By letting go of the pain we are not letting go of the love for the person who’s no longer with us. The grief we feel is an invisible chain we hang on to in the hope of remaining connected somehow, a silver cord which prevents us from separating completely. Although we may feel as if we are shamefully betraying our loved ones by daring to be happy without them, we are instead honoring their memory by infusing life into a moment they would love to share with us, and we can respectfully thank them for the beautiful memories they have gifted us with.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Choices


“If you are standing upright, don’t worry if your shadow is crooked.” ~ Chinese proverb


The past two weeks I’ve been reading an awesome book, the title of which was the selection of our book club for this month. In the story, Jimmy is one of three friends who meet as children and find their lives strangely reconnected as they become adults. Compared to his friends, Jimmy had all the ingredients for a disastrous recipe – a drunken father, an emotionally detached mother, and a childhood spent in a rundown neighborhood amid crime and poverty.

When Jimmy meets his second wife – after his first wife dies of cancer – she asks him if it is true that living a life of crime is in his blood. Jimmy, wanting to make a good impression on her, but also quite honest in the way he feels, replies that a more prominent tendency to commit crimes might be part of his DNA, but it is up to him whether he will ever allow it to get out or not. Being solely responsible for his small child after the death of his wife, he is determined to live honestly and within the boundaries of the law.

When I read that part, I was stunned at the accuracy of the statement...Jimmy is completely right. Regardless of what’s handed to us at birth, or throughout part of our lives when we were not in a position to change circumstances, we are in charge of what will happen to us and to our loved ones from this moment on.

Certainly, if one has lived a horrible reality, it is understandable that they feel compelled to act a certain way, yet, they are still responsible for the choices they make in the present, and those they will make it in the future. While past legacies and past mistakes might explain the cause of a certain type of behavior, they still don’t excuse it.

At some point, one must choose if they will continue to abuse themselves and others using their past as a validation for their poor choices or if they will pick themselves up and decide that enough is enough.

The cards one is dealt are important, but the game still has to be played before anyone can be labeled a winner or a loser. We have no choice on the cards we get, but we do have control on how we will manage our hand.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

The Dog and the Old Man

“The golden moments in the stream of life rush past us and we see nothing but sand; the angels come to visit us, and we only know them when they are gone.” ~George Elliot

I would like to share a story that my mother-in-law sent me a while back. The story is told by a young lady whose father struggles with personal anger after he can no longer work as a lumberjack because of health issues. After suffering a heart attack, he is invited to live with his daughter and her husband, but as days go by, tension begins to rise. The father is resentful of his declining health and lashes out at everyone.

The young woman prays for a resolution, but for months God is silent. Finally, she decides to call several clinics hoping to find some advice. During one of those calls, a friendly lady tells her about an article she has read about people with the same symptoms greatly benefiting from caring for a pet.

She drives to the local shelter to look for a dog, but none seem right for her father. Then, she spots a pointer in the last pen. Years have etched his face and muzzle with shades of gray; his hipbones jut out in lopsided triangles, but his eyes are calm and clear. She asks the attendant about the dog and is told that he just showed up near the shelter two weeks before.

When she gets home, she shows her father the dog she got for him, but he replies angrily that he doesn’t want a pet, and definitely not one so old and frail. Tension rises, and father and daughter face each other down as if preparing to duel. Just then, the dog walks up to the old man, sits in front of him, and raises his paw to touch the man’s leg. Time stands still. The old man continues to look at the dog who just sits there calmly, his paw still raised. He finally kneels down and takes the dog’s paw in his hand. From that day on they are inseparable. Within the course of a few months, all the anger, frustration and tension wash away, as the old man and his dog become more closely connected.

One night, the dog walks into the young lady’s room, whimpering. Considering the fact quite strange, she rushes to her father’s room. She finds him in his bed, his face peacefully relaxed and at ease in his final sleep. The dog raises his paw and touches him for one last time.

It’s not until the dog has passed away - and she reminisces about her father’s last few months - that the young lady realizes something important. She had prayed for her father to find peace, and had thought her prayers had gone unanswered. Yet they hadn’t. The girl on the phone and the dog were angels she hadn’t recognized. At the time, everything had seemed coincidental but none of it was – the woman, the article, and the dog that had mysteriously appeared at the shelter out of nowhere.

Prayers often seem to go unanswered because they don’t manifest as we imagined. We expect a result which will pacify our wants, because we are not aware of our true needs.

Sometimes the path to our greater good is an uncharted one, yet if we follow it with faith it will lead us where we need to go.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Two Sides to One Coin (repost)

A few years ago I ran into a book I normally would not have considered reading. It was a biography of sorts, describing the life of a Holy man. What I thought was going to be a very boring read turned out to be a very illuminating work, which really gave me chewable food for thought.

In one of the chapters, the Holy man was visited, one day, by the town drunk; as everyone expected – being the infamous derelict that he was – the man walked in showing no respect, and began his verbal lashing in a very loud fashion. After spewing hateful words, and displaying an unwarranted angry behavior, the drunken man was about to turn on his heels and leave again. The Holy man smiled, thanked him for coming and told him to come back any time. At this juncture, all the believers in the room were puzzled, and asked the Holy man if he knew who the hateful fellow was. The Holy man only smiled, then whispered softly: “Yes, he is the most loving man I’ve ever met. He just hasn’t met that part of himself yet.”

Needless to say, this chapter had me thinking for days. Was the Holy man delusional? Was he so enshrouded in the light of Spirit that he couldn’t tell the difference between a spiritual being and a heavenly reject? Or was the Holy man so wise in his assessment that he could see something that was obviously eluding me?

I started watching angry people with different eyes, hoping to get a clear picture of what the wise man was talking about. What I saw the next several months knocked my socks off. Most of the angry people out there really were only lost to themselves, roaming around unhappily and hoping to connect somehow.

Anger is an emotion. To trigger anger one must be open to feelings. Most angry people are simply very sensitive people who are afraid and put up an intimidating shield to stop people from getting too close. Someone told me once that if you can feel one emotion you are already familiar with its opposite - the twin, the other side of the coin. The two are at odds with each other, and always present at the same time; if one can be triggered, so can the other.

I began to test the waters anytime I met anyone who appeared angry and despondent. I would argue with them a little, just to trigger the one side of emotions they were most comfortable and familiar with; once they became angry, I would switch my response and expose them to the twin feeling while they were riding the peak of the opposite wave. The results were astounding. Fire cannot be put out with more fire, but only with its opposite. Opposites defuse and neutralize one another, creating a new stage of play.

And for those who wonder whatever happened to the drunken man in the book, he went back to see the Holy man several times; with each visit, his anger diminished a bit more and he was able to open up and listen, rather than lash out at every word the teacher uttered. Soon, he became his most faithful follower, and remained with the Holy man until his teacher’s death many years later.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

The Book of Obeah - Preface and Prologue

















PREFACE

“There will come a time when powerful signs herald a crossroads for Humanity. Events affecting one part of the Earth will instantly be known to the rest of the world and shall be recognized by a chosen few as the prophesied signs. Consequences of action and inaction will be apparent, cause and effect manifesting faster as this cycle draws toward conclusion. Inequities and imbalance will be painfully evident on individual, regional and global levels. Feelings of isolation, disconnection, and confusion will be widespread. Few will express these feelings, most choosing to mindlessly walk through their daily tasks, numbing themselves in countless ways. Hardships will flood the vast majority of people from every direction, creating a rising sea of anxiety. This will be reflected in Mother Earth being out of balance, with cataclysmic events taking place more regularly and more intensely as She strives to attain equilibrium.
A long-ago gathering of elders who revered and held sacred our connection to Mother Earth foresaw the time of this crossroads. A divinely inspired plan was conceived to counteract this state of imbalance, to be put into place at this crucial time. Over a preordained period, four distinct, devastating conflicts among societies throughout history will be confronted—one at a time—so as to heal suffering at the core, bringing about a state of wellness and balance. The prophetic elders knew they must protect this knowledge, for there would always be those who would seek to maintain control of the power. The elders’ descendants became protectors of this ancient wisdom tradition—sometimes knowingly, sometimes not—with their lives intrinsically entwined in guardianship of the sacred prophecy.
The painful disparities of the past and present must be exhumed to be honored and healed. Accountability will be imperative once a shift toward stability is initiated. The fate of All rests with a universal awakening…”

Translation of Choctaw tribal shaman proclamation; Bayou-Lacombe, LA; Circa 1878



PROLOGUE

Giselle never forgot the day she fled Louisiana.
It began as a fairly normal day, with the morning sun peeking through yellow gingham curtains framing the window above her bed. They were a recent gift from her mother, who had sewn them by hand as a surprise for her thirteenth birthday.
“Giselle, I’m going out for a little while,” Yvette announced from the hallway. “There's food in the kitchen. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
Her mom was already gone by the time Giselle woke enough to reply. She didn’t know where her mother was going or what was happening, but could sense something was very wrong. Yvette had always been cheerful and affectionate but lately was withdrawn.
Reluctantly, Giselle got out of bed and quickly dressed. Once again, it was left to her to take care of her little brother. She hoped eight-year-old Francois hadn't felt the tension surrounding them lately.
She was worried about her father rarely being home; even more alarming was her mother's physical condition. Yvette seemed to worsen by the minute, with dark circles under her blue eyes, blending with an increasingly gray complexion.
Throughout the day Giselle did her best to entertain Francois and distract herself at the same time. They were in the middle of a card game when Yvette burst through the front door in a frenzy, panting as she ran to her bedroom and locked the door.
Francois looked at his big sister, silently pleading for answers. Giselle had no answers but knew better than to ask. Although mother and daughter were normally close, Yvette had grown secretive and moody in the last few days.
The two children sat motionless, afraid to breathe. It wasn't long before the bedroom door was flung open, revealing a wildly disheveled Yvette, clearly terrified, with eyes darting in all directions looking for threats only she could see.
“Mama, please tell me what’s wrong!”
Giselle ran over and Yvette clutched her hands in desperation, as if the girl could somehow save her from madness.
“We must leave now, child! There’s no time to lose!”
Giselle looked into her mother’s frightened eyes. “What are you saying, Mama? Why do we have to leave—what about Daddy?”
“There’s no time, Giselle. We have to leave now. Pack a few things for yourself, and I’ll take care of the rest.”
Giselle went to Francois, huddled in a far corner, his little body shaking. She wanted to scoop him up in her arms and comfort him, shielding them both from what was happening, but knew she must do as she was told. Yvette needed her now more than ever.

The children followed close behind as their mother led them through the thick vegetation of the swamp, stopping only to catch their breath.
The evening shadows had just begun their dance with the waning sun when Yvette paused at the base of an ancient oak tree. Giselle and Francois watched curiously as Yvette reached into the hollow of the trunk. Her back was to the children, but Giselle saw her carefully place something large and square into a cloth bag.
Yvette motioned for them to once again follow her through the winding paths among the trees. Eyes fixed straight ahead, she was lost in her own world, oblivious to the growing distress of her children.
Giselle carried Francois several times and did her best to soothe his cries. They continued this way through the endless darkness for many hours until they reached Morgan City.
They went directly to the railroad station where the children collapsed onto a wooden bench, and Yvette proceeded to buy tickets to take them away from the only home they had ever known.

The memory of their flight from the bayou was still vivid in Giselle’s mind and continued to evoke intense feelings within her, now seventy years later.
Sitting at her kitchen table, gaze fixed on a spellbound moth dancing around the ceiling light, Giselle knew time was running out.
Melody must be told the truth; an explosive chain of events was about to unfold around her granddaughter. She deeply regretted the decision to harbor such a secret her entire life.
Is there anyone in this world without regret when death is near? This question hovered in her mind all afternoon. Giselle dreaded the effect her passing would have on her beloved Melody, already too familiar with grief and loss. Even more she dreaded the impact of the revelations which lay ahead. The world as Melody knew it would soon crumble. Not being able to shelter the child weighed heavily on Giselle.
At least I was born into this clandestine world; Melody will now be thrust into it with no warning, no preparation. It was no surprise that her granddaughter had been chosen to fulfill the prophecy. Melody had an inner strength, with a core of integrity and sound judgment. Over the years Giselle had also observed Melody’s intuitive abilities. Her granddaughter scoffed at the idea of having intuition, but Giselle knew otherwise.
It was troubling that Melody repressed so much of herself, but her grandmother understood why she kept the world at a distance.
You can’t do that much longer, child. The walls are coming down; the veil exists and is growing more transparent with every breath.Giselle had waited years for the dream—a message—and it came to her three nights ago. The prophecy was clear, and Melody was the next link in this chain. Giselle was charged with revealing this legacy to her granddaughter but had no idea where to begin.
It suddenly dawned on her how to open this door. Of course! It was the only way.
Upon her death, Melody would receive a letter instructing her to go where it had all started for their family. This is where she would be guided to discover the ancient web of mystery at the heart of the legacy.
Giselle knew that, Annie, her own daughter, wouldn’t support Melody during the trials to come. But Melody would be fine; she was accustomed to her mother being emotionally absent.
Her granddaughter would stay busy in the weeks after her death, attending to all the details without outwardly questioning anything. She would do so out of love and respect, but also to keep the pain at bay.
There was no alternative.
She removed a colorful pouch from the pocket of her housecoat and withdrew an unusual, exquisite string of rosary beads. As she clutched the rosary to her heart, the pale, bony fingers of her right hand closed around the pen. She again looked up at the delicate moth, fervently praying Melody wouldn’t have to be sacrificed to the light.
“Please God, protect Melody and guide her on this path. Help her stay open…help guide her to the truth.”
Giselle began to write, knowing her granddaughter’s life was soon to be changed forever.



This title is available for pre-order on Amazon.com: http://www.amazon.com/Book-Obeah-Sandra-Carrington-Smith/dp/1846942993/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1257860654&sr=8-1
For more information please visit www.bookofobeah.com or watch the novel video trailer on Youtube: http://www.amazon.com/Book-Obeah-Sandra-Carrington-Smith/dp/1846942993/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1257860654&sr=8-1

The Value of Conflict


“The greatest conflicts are not between two people but between one person and himself.” ~ Garth Brooks


Great things can come out of conflict, often starting on a personal level. When an event suddenly precipitates, wounds are exposed, giving the individual the opportunity to go through a process of self-cleansing aimed at preventing any additional festering. Conflict can, at times, be destructive, but we must keep in mind that if something is faulty, then we must knock the old structure down before we can rebuild a more solid one.

Generally speaking, salt sprinkled on healthy skin might, at worst, mildly irritate; but, if the same amount of salt is placed on an open wound, it will burn and cause quite a bit of discomfort until the wound is flushed.

Whenever we run into a person, or a situation, which causes excessive annoyance, before we allow emotions to take over and feed the exchange, we should sit back and ask ourselves why we are so irritated. Could it be, somehow, that whatever is causing us so much distress is merely exposing a sore spot within ourselves which we are not wiling to consider?

It is certainly easier to lash out at others for the faults we hide within ourselves, because the “punishment” we receive this way is one we endure by reflection and not by direct self-judgment which may be too harsh to bear. Something the person said touches on a weak point, and in some strange way, what they said unleashes an emotional charge already present inside of us from a past hurt. Once emotions start slipping through, we feel vulnerable, and we become angry; by lashing out we create a boomerang effect, and we are fed the negative energy we didn’t dare throwing at ourselves.

Strangely, we seem to attract into our lives people who mirror our own dark twin, and by dealing with them we learn how to deal with ourselves. Their connection to us might not be immediately apparent, but if one is honest and truly willing to look within, it won’t be long before the tie is identified.

We can’t erase conflict from our lives, but we can change the way we are affected by it if we can train ourselves to see it as a learning tool rather than a hindering block. Conflict on the way is like having a compact mirror with us at all times – we might not like what we see once we look at the reflection, but we now have a tool to begin our improvement.

Monday, November 9, 2009

The Boy and the Duck









“You have been my friend. That in itself is a tremendous thing. I wove my webs for you because I liked you. After all, what’s a life, anyway? We are born, we live a little, we die. A spider’s life can’t help being something of a mess, with all this trapping and eating flies. By helping you, perhaps I was trying to lift up my life a trifle. Heaven knows anyone’s life can stand a little of that.” ~ E. B. White

My son Michael loves fishing. That boy could sit on the bank of a pond the whole day, thoughts wandering to distant worlds as he waits for fish to bite. During his outings to the pond, a tiny body of water in the middle of a neighborhood like many others, surrounded by pretty homes and a newly installed wooden gazebo, Michael has made an unusual friend – Alfred the duck. Several weeks ago, Alfred had a friend, another duck which, like him, seemed to have missed the bus going south. Both ducks stayed around the pond, using the spillway for shelter, but lately Alfred’s friend has been missing, and nobody seems to know what happened to it.

Over time, Alfred has warmed up to Michael. At first, a little apprehensive about the intentions of this young boy trespassing on his territory, he hissed and ran off, waddling the way ducks do; but, once he realized that Michael meant no harm - and was in fact bringing an offering of peace in the shape of bread – he gradually came a little closer each day.

Yesterday, Michael asked to go fishing at about five o’clock, and since his brother didn’t want to go with him, I grabbed a book and we drove down to the pond. On our way out we made sure to bring some bread for Alfred. I pulled my car by the edge of the pond behind the spillway, and made myself comfortable in the seat while Michael got out of the car, fishing rod over his shoulder and bread in his hand. He stopped by the entrance of the spillway and called Alfred; after a moment the little bundle of white feathers emerged and followed Michael to his chosen spot on the other side of the pond.

My original intention was to read while I waited, but what was unfolding outside the car was so endearing that I put the book down and just watched.

Michael got his fishing rod ready and prepared to cast, while Alfred supervised by the edge of the pond; when Michael sat down, the duck went to settle beside him. I saw Michael feed him a few pieces of bread, which he gobbled eagerly but not aggressively; even after the bread was gone, Alfred continued to sit by him. When Michael caught a small fish and stood up to reel it in, the duck walked over and stood beside him. After about an hour, Michael was done fishing for the day. He walked back toward the car, and Alfred waddled back with him, side by side. When they reached the entrance of the spillway, Alfred went in and Michael continued to walk after telling his little friend goodbye for the evening.

I never got to read a single page of my book in that hour, but what I saw warmed my heart – friends comes in many packages, sometimes even in the likes of a lonely white duck named Alfred.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

An Unexpected Reminder


“The mere fact that you have obstacles to overcome is in your favor…” ~ Robert Collier


Yesterday, while on my way to pick up my son from a sleepover, I got a flat tire shortly after leaving my house. I pulled over into a side street, called my husband to inform him of where the car was located and walked home.

It was a nice walk – the trees lining the street were raining hues of orange and gold, and the breeze was cool enough to remind one of the changes ahead. As I was admiring the small bunches of leaves neatly bunched by the base of the trees, something caught my eye…in the midst of the soft leafy bed was a five dollar bill!

I picked it up and gingerly walked the rest of the way. When I got back, I called my son’s friend’s parents to let them know I would be a bit late picking him up. They said that it was no problem; in fact, they offered to give him a ride so I would not have to rush my husband getting the tire fixed.

While I was talking to them, my oldest son made some coffee, and we both sat at the kitchen table chatting for a bit. It was a lovely time. We talked about lots of different things, and I thoroughly enjoyed those moments with him. Toward the end of our coffee chat, the phone rang and I was overjoyed to hear the voice of a friend I hadn’t talked to in years.

Shortly after, my youngest son was dropped off, and my husband arrived to fix the tire. Suddenly I realized something…if my tire hadn’t gone flat, I would have missed out on a lot of good things. Somehow, this obstacle allowed me to slow down and smell the proverbial roses.

It’s hard to properly assess an obstacle in the heat of its manifestation, as our attention is absorbed by the difficulties of the moment, but if one is able to detach from the emotional charge which is brewed during a trying experience, good things began to emerge, and when all is said and done, we realize that we have gained more than we have lost.

Obstacles slow us down and give us the chance to notice the blessings we would otherwise bypass.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Blog for Hope: Two Kitties Looking for a Home, and a Home Looking for a Tenant


Happy chilly Saturday morning!

The cooler breeze reminds us once again that winter is at the door. While this cold, harsh season provides the earth with an opportunity to rest and regenerate, its dipping temperatures and shorter days accentuate the hardship of struggling families even more.

Blog for Hope is here to reach out to families and individuals who need a little lift. If you are willing to share a bit of your time, skills, or financial help, please post to the main page of the group, http://www.wral.com/golo/profile/4320847/ or e-mail me directly at lunanera@netzero.net

If you are in need, or know someone who is, you are encouraged to do the same.

Today's highlights:

One of our beloved Golo members is going through a terrible time right now. Although he is trying every possible evenue to save what he has, he is well aware that he will be losing his home to foreclosure if he can't find a tenant soon. The home is a ranch in Cary NC; if you are interested, or know anyone who might, please leave a note on Nicsautomotive's profile or contact me directly.

Because of the uncertainty with his financial future, Nic is also looking for a good home for two of his fur babies, Crystal and bemis. We've all had the opportunity to read the adventures of little Bemis as he made his way into Nic's world and heart one rainy night. Since this little guy had a rough start, Nic doesn't want to expose him to an uncertain future, and he would be happy if little Bemis could find a happy home, where he is loved and cherished. Crystal has been Nic's companion for a while now, but like Bemis, she is often forced to a lonely life without much human companionship while Nic is out working, trying to keep the ship afloat. The perfect scenario would be one in which Bemis and Crystal are adopted together, since they have developed a tight bond.

Please, if you can help with either of these causes, leave me a note ASAP. Nic is trying is hardest, and he deserves a little support. Blog for Hope is a venture aimed at raising hopes for those who feel they have none left. So, join me here, and let's all unite to shine a ray of hope in Nic's direction. If you belong to any other social networks, please feel free to copy and paste this information. Word of mouth can be a very powerful tool to help someone in need.

Have an awesome day, everybody!!!

Friday, November 6, 2009

Carrying the Baggage of Others


“Some people think it’s holding on that makes one strong- sometimes it is letting go.” ~ Author unknown


Recently, I have had the opportunity to talk to a friend who’s lived through such a series of ordeals that it’s hard to believe he has managed to maintain his sanity. Although he keeps a good face in front of adversity, he is suffering terribly under the cheerful mask.

The other night we talked at length about letting go of the pain. Since most of it has been caused by other people whose behaviors he couldn’t help, or prevent, he shouldn’t be holding on to the pain their actions have caused; yet, he can’t find a way to let it all go. In his mind, if he lets go, he’s going to completely lose the people he loves most, but even worse, he is afraid to lose himself. In clear terms, he believes that he has no control in the way he feels, and that he will have to carry this heavy load the rest of his life.

In reality, we are always in control of anything that affects our lives. We might not be able to change the way others behave around us, or some of the circumstances that unfold, but we can choose how much we are affected by it all. If we are not responsible for what happened, and had no way of controlling the outcome, holding on to the pain is like being punished for the acts of another. If someone robbed a store, and we were mistakenly charged for it, we would be irate and we would demand that all accusations are quickly dismissed, so that we can move on with our lives. Why should we continue to serve the sentence of another if we had no part in their crimes?

Embracing the past, and accepting it, does in no way mean that we must continue where others left off. We should accept that some things happened out of the sphere of our control, but we shouldn’t try to bring them forth into the future. If the abuse is suffered at the hands and words of loved ones, we shouldn’t feel guilty thinking that we are ungrateful simply because we are choosing to love ourselves. We can look at people who are part of our lives in two different ways – some are there to teach us how to become the person we want to be, others are there to teach us how to avoid becoming who they are. They both serve a purpose and should be honored for it, but in the latter case, at some point we must see that their role must come to an end.

By refusing to continue carrying the load of others’ mistakes, we are not cutting the ties of love that bind us to them, now or in the past; we are merely wiping off the emotional charge which is keeping all in an unhealthy form of bondage. Most of all, when we choose to let go we are not condoning the actions of those who hurt us, but we are setting ourselves free from an invisible rope which prevents us from moving forward. Once the extra weight is put down, it’s amazing how much faster we can walk.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Looking for Purpose

We often hear people wondering about their life purpose. Although this is a subject that can be explored on many levels, and be approached differently by varied systems of belief, the underlying question is basically the same: Why are we here?

According to multiple expressions of spirituality, we are here to learn basic soul lessons which will elevate our spirit toward purity and greater understanding of universal laws. Certain spiritual traditions teach that Spirit creates different images of earthly manifestation to learn how to recognize all the different possibilities of its creation.

Even when the questions of collective purpose are generally answered by the above assumptions, we still don’t know what our individual purpose is. Are we here to create something, to support someone else during their journey, or is it even possible that some of us are here to facilitate a revelation and be the catalyst for a specific event?

No matter how insignificant we might feel - or how small our contribution may appear - we are not able to see the full picture as long as we are a part of it. For example, a woman might have worked extremely hard raising children, and may feel that she has not accomplished much of anything else in her life, especially if her children are not deemed “successful” in the eyes of society. By the time she reaches her final days, the woman has no way of knowing that one of her great-grandchildren will give birth to someone who will save humanity, someday, by discovering a new medical treatment which will revolutionize modern medicine. Maybe, our true purpose is simply that of helping others rewire their inner light, or even to feed the hungry stray dog that will save a baby trapped in a building engulfed by flames.

As far as our individual purpose is concerned, we really need to focus on the small things; have we made – or can we make - a difference in someone’s life? Have we taught someone something valuable? Have we smiled at a stranger we have met on the street, and generated a ripple of cheer which will spread beyond our knowledge? Have we hugged a friend and made them feel less alone? Each of us holds a great power, that of changing the world starting with ourselves.

At the time of our conception we fought hard to survive as an individual, and reach the shores of this world; we were determined to get here and live whatever purpose we held true in our hearts; yet, once the ship finally touched land we forgot we had a specific mission, and allowed the winds of circumstance to disconnect us from our inner truth.

Regardless of how much we understand, our life is precious and priceless, and should always be viewed as a privilege and an opportunity. It is up to us to turn it into one.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

The Bearded Dragon


“Boundless love always manages somehow to sparkle through your limited form.” ~ John Welwood


Something very strange happened to me yesterday. I had gone to the pet store near my husband’s business to pick up a can of goldfish flakes, and since I had a few minutes to spare I went to the live animal section to check out the snakes.

While I was admiring a baby water dragon, I saw something moving in the enclosure right beside it, so I looked and saw a bearded dragon. Since I’ve never found bearded dragons particularly attractive, I averted my eyes back to his more colorful water cousin, but with the corner of my eye I noticed that the bearded dragon had come right to the separating glass and was looking straight at me.

I looked again, and that’s when the bearded dragon put his tiny hands on the glass and lifted himself up, as if he wanted to be held. If that wasn’t crazy enough, I felt compelled to put my hand on the glass of the case and he leaned against it. Totally overwhelmed by the dragon’s response, I gently tapped on the glass and ran my finger over the surface as if I was petting him. When I did that, the dragon leaned against the glass even more, and closed his eyes.

I stood there for several minutes, then I pulled my hand off and the dragon immediately opened his eyes, staring directly into my own. I was smitten. Even if only for a few moments, I had connected with this tiny creature.

I reluctantly left him and went to pay for the fish food. I wanted to ask the cashier if it is normal for bearded dragons to be that sociable, and if they routinely bond with humans they’ve never seen before, but the feeling of what had just happened was so pure that I didn’t want to taint it by talking about it.

As I drove to pick up my daughter from school, I thought back about the dragon and about the incredible connections we make when we least expect them. My reality and that of this tiny lizard are worlds apart, yet a connection was undeniably there. We don’t have to be or think alike for energy to flow between us and others.

The body and the rational mind see the differences that exist among people and other living creatures. Spirit sees everything and everyone as one, only separated by our individual perceptions.

I don’t know if the little dragon will still be there tomorrow or in the days to come, but even if I never see him again, I know that for one single moment I was given an amazing gift, one which I will carry in my heart for years to come.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

One Step Closer

“It is not enough to take steps which may some day lead to a goal; each step must be itself a goal and a step likewise.” ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


Tidbit published a very inspiring post yesterday, about weight loss. She described how after trying the quick-fix methods with no lasting results she realized she had to change her eating habits completely, and side them with a regular exercise routine. Over the course of time she lost over 240 pounds, an astonishing amount, but the cool thing that struck me most about her post is the fact that by implementing such radical changes of lifestyle, she has accomplished something even greater – she learned that true success is determined by constant goal-setting, and by the self-discipline one develops along the way.

Whenever we face a daunting task – or pretty much any hard decision – the choice we must make is whether we are willing to stick with the longer route of long-term achievements, or if our goal is one of instant gratification.

I do not personally know Tidbit, but I could almost bet that her initial decision probably went through several layers of doubt during the first few weeks, when the budding results were still hard to see. I’m only assuming, so I hope that if I’m wrong Tidbit will correct me. In her place, most would have found it hard to remain focused on the distant goal while the work at hand was so hard and the results so minimal at first. As self-discipline has largely become a thing of the past, and societal pressure toward instant gratification continues to increase, many struggle to keep going unless they can see measurable results almost immediately.

Since long-term achievements can indeed appear scary, we can try to make the road to success a little easier to travel. Naturally, we can stay motivated for brief amounts of time, especially if we can rely on a source of support, so it wouldn’t be too hard – until the results begin to show and become the reward – to set smaller goals under the umbrella of the major goal itself. In the case of weight loss, for example, 240 pounds might seem like an unreachable destination, but it’s easy to wrap one’s mind around losing one or two pounds at a time. Once the smaller goal is achieved, a new one is set, followed by yet another one.

It is wonderful to have a big plan and find the resolve to begin the journey, but we should never forget that every step is getting us a bit closer, even if the destination is still nowhere in sight.

Monday, November 2, 2009

House Guests

“Your own mind is a sacred enclosure into which nothing harmful can enter except by your promotion.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is amazing how many of us go to great lengths to ensure that nothing harmful will enter our homes, but we rarely worry about the negative influences that we allow to pass into our minds. Most of us have specific and unique requirements for the people we welcome through our doors – no improper language, no smoking, no muddy shoes on the carpet, no loud talk…the sky is the limit – and if these people go against our wishes when they come in as guests, we have the right to tell them they should modify their behavior. If they don’t, we clearly have the right to ask them to leave.

Access to our minds works the same way. Regardless of how much power we think someone around us might have, they do not own our minds – we do. As hard as it might be to “evict” them, we have the upper hand on the situation, and they cannot remain if we don’t give them permission to stay.

Very often we don’t think we have that power. People and negative thoughts come into our lives and make themselves at home, leading us to think they have the right to tell us how to feel or think. If we don’t push them out the door the moment we notice their presence, they insinuate into the closets of our minds and look for weak, unhealed spots; once they find them, they immediately recognize old hurts as allies and use them as nourishment to grow new seeds of self-doubt.

In order to begin the cleaning process, we must first stop the constant flow of unwanted junk. Once we are stabilized, we can finally concentrate on cleaning out the old which no longer serves us. Keeping out unwanted people and thoughts is easier than it seems. We envision horrible dramas unfolding, and family members and friends who no longer talk to us after we tell them what our expectations are; even worse, we assume we don’t have the strength to keep the intruders at bay, and it will be only a matter of time before they come barging through the door again. In reality, their power is just an illusion, and their tendency to be offended just because we ask for respect only highlights the fact that we don’t need them in our world.

It is okay to invite in people and thoughts different than those we normally entertain, but they should know the moment they walk across the threshold that their input will only be considered and not blindly accepted as unshakable truth. After all, when all is said and done, they come and go and leave us to pick up the pieces alone.

Choose wisely who and what you let in, and never be afraid to reclaim your space as your own. Your name is the only one on the lease agreement.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Daily Vitamins (Repost)


Many people dutifully take vitamins every morning, work out and diet when needed, no matter how time consuming and sacrifice-demanding such steps often are.


The society we live in – one based largely on image and importance of the body – promotes and encourages us to go to great lengths to ensure good health and appearance; but how much time does the average individual invests in mental health and the pursuit of personal happiness?


Research has shown extensively how important it is to remain positive and seek the silver lining.


Let’s imagine that we went for a check-up, and the doctor told us that we need to go on a strict diet for health related reasons; most likely, we would anxiously listen, take the good doctor’s advice, and cut out all the foods that can affect us negatively.


What if that same doctor told us to go on a “mental diet”? Would we cut out all negative thoughts? Or would we just shrug our shoulders and keep living the same old way?


A rigorous mental diet is indeed very hard to follow; if one pays attention, it is amazing how much easier it is for us to pick up negative vibes than positive ones. It is interesting to try it for a day, and attempt to not give in to any negative thoughts for that window of time. It’s much easier to not eat!


The best way to achieve things is to follow the path of least resistance. We get frightened and anxious when facing something which appears paramount, but everybody is probably comfortable taking a few baby steps to learn how to walk.


So, the program is going to be very simple: at night time, before going to bed, let’s try to identify three positive things that happened throughout our day, and analyze briefly why they occurred. They could be extremely small things, such as a stranger smiling warmly, good news regarding someone we love, the chance to finish a book we really enjoy, a cup of exceptional coffee…the list is endless.


As simple as this regimen may appear, it works beautifully. We are used to dismiss simple things as ineffective, as we are conditioned to think that good results can only be achieved through exhausting work, and quality can only be purchased by exorbitant sums of money.


Ultimately, we can look at this exercise as a “mental vitamin”; it won’t cure all ills, but it will certainly ensure that we are taking steps toward improved health and renewed happiness.