Does Wealth Lead to Happiness?

“Life in abundance comes only through great love” ~ Elbert Hubbard

Does wealth create happiness? Although a life free of financial worries sounds like the answer to all problems, I personally believe that it is not wealth that makes happiness but happiness that makes wealth.

In my opinion, there is no difference between types of energy, aside from the division between positive and negative. Both of them exist in the Universe, and everything we are, see, hear, feel or touch is made of both. Money and material things are no different – they are a manifestation of energy.

When we feel good about ourselves, and feel we deserve to receive good things, the positive energy we send out is a clear signal to the Universe that we are ready and willing to receive the many blessings that are available. When, on the other hand, we feel trapped into a dark tunnel of fear and doubt, we also feel that we have failed ourselves and others, and the signal we send out is that we don’t deserve the blessings that are available to us.

Very often, the prison we are in is an invisible one only we can see. Its walls are built with bricks made of guilt and unresolved issues. In the unfortunate event that we have done anything wrong and have gotten away with it, we fall prey of an even worse internal conflict – while our ego rejoices that we have won one, our inner spirit knows the scale isn’t balanced; justice is not done, the deed has not received adequate punishment, and we subconsciously take it upon ourselves to ensure that we get our just deserved.

Regardless of what we have done, we can’t go back and change things. Our inner spirit knows that, and does not expect any such thing. What we can do, is honor our ability to feel remorse and guilt, because it is a sure sign that our conscience is working, but once we have done so, we must also allow ourselves to let those feelings go and start afresh.

Beating ourselves over something we cannot change will not right the wrongs of the past, but will rather cause us to stumble again in the future. Instead, a complete reshuffling of our life cards needs to take place. First of all, we need to differentiate the things we feel bad about that are really wrong from those that are deemed wrong from a cultural point of view. In the latter case, what we have done may not even be wrong per se, but it is considered so because it goes against the grain of our established societal rules.

And if we can’t forgive ourselves entirely, let’s begin by forgiving others, knowing that, like us, they are held captive within the confines of a similar prison. Forgiving others allows us to heal those parts of ourselves that we can’t directly reach, and gives us a head start on a journey of true love.

On the map of abundance, selfless love is the main highway to get to destination; no toll payments are required and the sun is always shining bright at the end of the horizon.

Beyond Appearances

“I truly believe that compassion provides the basis of human survival.” ~ The Dalai Lama

I’ve always enjoyed waking up early in the morning. Every day carries a new opportunity to learn something, the chance to develop a new awareness, the gift of growing up a bit more with each spontaneous experience, so as I start a new day I am usually as excited as a child on Christmas Eve.

Yesterday, that unique learning experience took place at the bank, where I saw an older gentleman basically shredding the teller to pieces because of a hold on a check. Having done the same type of work before, I knew why holds are placed on checks, and I also knew that the teller is in no way responsible – the computer prompts the hold and she has no other option but follow it if she wants to properly handle the transaction.

Although the man looked as if he was on the verge of a heart attack, the teller was cool and collected, and if I may say, quite kind. She explained the terms of the hold and offered to direct the gentleman to her supervisor to see if anything could be resolved.

After the transaction was finalized, it was my turn. I smiled at the teller and told her how much I admired her demeanor, to which she replied something I did not expect.

She explained that the gentleman in question was going through a very hard financial time lately – he had been laid off a few months before, and was only making a living with odd jobs he found here and there. This check was probably payment for one of those jobs, and he was angry that he could not cash in what was rightfully his. She knew his indignation was masked frustration, and not a direct attack.

When I walked out of the bank, I wondered how many people I run into every day that are going through a hard time. Could their spouse just have passed away? Could their child be terminally ill? Could they be facing losing their home or something else just as cherished?

Truth is, we don’t know. All we can see is the surface of the water, not what is happening beneath the top layer. Ultimately, happy people do not try to make others miserable, so if someone is lashing out or being difficult, it is likely that they are experiencing a trauma of their own.

In this case, the customer could not pay his bills without cashing in the check; somewhere else a mother could be snapping at her children because, if she can’t account for every moment of their day, she might find herself explaining her behavior to a judge. Another case could be that of someone who recently lost a loved one, and hasn’t come to terms with their pain yet.

Pain is often redirected and expressed in ways which allow us to blow off steam without broadcasting the true reason for the discomfort. But no matter what the individual situation, a gesture of kindness can indeed go a very long way.

Taking Back Our Power

“Love is supreme and unconditional; like is nice but limited.” ~ Duke Ellington

Someone sent me an interesting e-mail a few days ago, which I felt I should share. It spoke of dispensing love to all, but particularly to unconditionally love our enemies.

“Jesus said to love our enemies. It's difficult sometimes to get our arms around that concept in our daily lives - when someone ticks us off or says something that insults us, or insults what we believe in or someone we care about. In his book "Jesus and Non-Violence, A Third Way", Walter Wink says that love of enemies is the recognition that our enemy is too, a child of God. "When we demonize our enemies, calling them names and identifying them with absolute evil, we deny that they have that of God within them that make transformation possible. Instead, we play God."

Loving our enemies in indeed a challenge; it’s easy to give in to the temptation of doing otherwise, but if we do so, we are only shutting the door to new opportunities for ourselves. It is okay to be angry or upset when something happens, or someone does something wrong, as the power of that anger is often the force that drives us out of apathy. It is, however, quite detrimental to hold on to that anger once the situation has lived its life cycle.

Inside each of us are two intelligent minds at work – one, the rational mind, analyzes all the wrongdoings and keeps track of ego bruises; the other one, our soul mind, forgives all, for it knows that the light of others is the same as our own. By denying that this eternal light exists in others we break the chain of connection that naturally exists among all living creatures, and we isolate ourselves from the source of energy of the Universe.

Once we become disconnected – and our spirit mind is no longer being fed by unconditional love - we feel depleted and tired, and begin to entertain feelings of self-doubt and fear. Because the energy running through our spirits is the same, once we wish something positive or negative on someone else, that energy mirrors back on us. Equally, by forgiving others we forgive the parts of ourselves we may not be able to reach otherwise.

Forgiveness does not give our enemies license to hurt again, nor does it excuse the acts already committed, but rather it frees us from the influence those acts still have on our lives, and gives us back the power we forfeited in the past.

Forgiveness is the lighter we loan to another soul to light their inner flame, while kindness is the fuel that keeps the fire alive. By forgiving we cripple the ego of those who hurt us.

If we refuse to forgive and be kind we lose the right to complain when our enemies continue to walk in darkness and step on others on their blind journey. Shadows can only be dispersed by turning on the light.

The Beauty of Imperfection

“There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way.” ~ Christopher Morley

Some time ago I pondered about how different my life is now compared to what it was when I was younger. I remember needing others’ approval a lot, especially when it came to my parents. Although they never had non-realistic expectations for me, I had them for myself.

Anything less than a straight A was not good enough for me at school, and I always strived to reach perfection. I kept my house fairly neat but polished it within an inch of its life if someone was coming over. Same with the kids – I had this image made up in my mind of the perfect household, and anything less than that simply wasn’t good enough.

Somehow, through the years, I changed. It was not anything I did different, or anything I consciously acknowledged, but over time I realized that happy children are more fun than perfectly behaved children, and a house that’s not completely organized is more comfortable to live in.

My huge test was this year, when my parents came to visit. I had been extremely busy before their arrival, and had no chance to organize my house the way I always did. I took a look at it right before going to the airport and told myself it really didn’t matter – my parents were coming to see me, not my house.

And indeed I was right. I don’t think my parents thought twice about the toys or anything else that wasn’t in place. They were so happy to see us that we could have lived in a rundown shed and they wouldn’t have noticed.

That’s when I realized how often we needlessly worry about things that are only alive in our own minds. We assume we know how people will feel because that’s the way we would in their place, but in reality we have no way of knowing.

I have friends who have destroyed relationships because they were certain their partner was being unfaithful, when in fact the other person had no intention to betray them. Their doubts were the mere product of their own insecurities.

These days I no longer worry about what others think. I accept the fact that they may live, think or behave differently than I do, and I am comfortable being my own person.

Perfection is a state of mind, and it truly is in the eyes of the beholder. I believe my life is perfect as is now – I don’t have a perfect house, perfect children, a perfect spouse, and I am certainly not perfect myself, but I am happy and at peace. Even when some things remain undone.

The Lady at the Airport

"Our entire life consists ultimately in accepting ourselves as we are.” ~ Jean Anouilh

(Please note: The recent blog entries are being posted approximately one week belatedly; in case mention of events do not coincide with calendar date. :) We're double posting to get caught up!)

Yesterday my parents flew back to Europe. While we were at the airport, I glanced at a woman sitting on a wheelchair right beside the row of seats my parents had chosen, and when I saw her dropping her purse on the floor, I rushed to pick up her belongings and handed them back to her, to which she responded with a bright smile and a twinkle in her eyes. She thanked me profusely, and asked where my parents were from.

I explained they live in Italy, and she told me that she had studied arts in Florence before the accident that crippled her. She said that living in Italy showed her the way life should be lived – more easy-going and in the moment – and she recalled turning those observations into practice once she found out she could no longer walk. “I used to live in the fast lane” she said, “and never stopped long enough to realize how much I had taken for granted.”

I could only nod, so she took a sip of her drink and continued. “See this coke?’ she asked, “I never really took the time to notice how it really tastes. Before, a coke was just something pleasant to sip. Now, no matter what I taste or endure, I try to fully live the different nuances of my experiences.”

I asked her how not being able to walk made her feel, and expected a victimized reply. Instead, I was in for a surprise.

She quietly watched a little boy as he struggled to drag his backpack and keep up with his mother, and a soft smile formed on her lips. “See? I would never have noticed that before I became unable to walk. Now, everything I see, feel, touch, taste, or experience, is a joy and an inspiration. Being crippled taught me how to live.”

She mentioned being bitter in the beginning, and going through depression when she first learned of her predicament, but she had learned how to accept the things she could not change. She had decided soon after that she would live for the moment and would cherish every experience, knowing that things hardly ever happen by chance.

After I returned to my seat, I couldn’t help, once I a while, looking at the lady as she watched the other passengers rush by. There was peace in her eyes, and she radiated happiness. Her appreciation for life hadn’t come from the things she no longer could do, but the ones that were available to her now.

Through her tragedy, this woman had discovered patience, humility and serenity – her obstacles had been nothing more than opportunities dressed in a dreary costume.

She had lost her legs, but on that fateful day, her true being had grown wings of love. And never before had she been that free.

The Yellow Rose

I believe that one of the most important encounters of my life – one that has changed the course of my thinking, and my general living approach – took place when I was about thirteen. I had gone with my mother to visit some friends of hers, and I immediately felt drawn to an old man who lived there – I would later find out he was the father of my mother’s friend.

The man was an easy one to spot. With snow white hair and a fluffy beard he somewhat reminded me of Santa Claus. Little did I know then, that in so many ways he really was a Santa Claus, as the gift he gave me that day was indeed the most precious I ever received.

As a teenager, I couldn’t be bothered with spiritual stuff – I lived for boys and clothes, and as all teenagers, I believed that a life free of drama was a waste of time.

Well, this particular day, we were going to see my mother’s friends, and although I did not dare roll my eyes in boredom during the trip, I certainly did so in my head. What a dreadfully boring afternoon this was shaping up to be! We arrived at about 3:00pm, and walked in. My mother’s friend had coffee and pastries ready, and we all sat down with her. Shortly after we arrived I asked if I could go out in the yard. I figured there would be even less to do there, since they lived in the country, but at least I didn’t have to listen to the annoying chat.

I walked outside, and that’s when I noticed the man. From the back he was an ethereal vision, and created a marked contrast against the vibrant green of the foliage around him – his hair blended with the collar of his white shirt, and where that ended, white trousers began. He turned around when he heard me approaching and flashed a smile as white as his hair and shirt. “Well, hello young lady” he said. I nodded, uncertain whether to feel annoyed at the prospect of more adult conversation, or relieved that I wasn’t alone.

“Would you like helping me weed the flowers?” He asked, his intense brown eyes peering through thick dark lashes as he pointed to a small row of rose plants. I shrugged, walked toward him and began to pull some of the weeds growing around the plants. With my city training I had no clue I had to watch out for thorns, and I pricked my finger after the third weed. I instinctively sucked my finger and saw the man smile. Was he making fun of me?? The nerve! Here I was helping him and he found it funny that I got hurt. I got up, ready to leave and go back inside.

“Please, don’t leave” he said, “thorns are one of the downfalls of cultivating roses, but the flowers are a gift of Heaven. He picked one of the roses and handed it to me. It was an explosion of yellow silk, and I don’t think I had ever seen one so pretty.

“See?” said the man, “its thorns hurt for a moment, but its beauty makes you forget the pain. People are like roses – we see the thorns first, but if we work past them, what we find is worth the struggle. Tonight, when you go to bed, ask yourself this question – who are you, really? Are you a rose, or just its thorns?”

“Who am I really?” – This question haunted me for years, and maybe I haven’t quite fully answered it yet, but one thing for sure is that, since that day, I’ve known that if I ever wanted to find my inner rose I would have to work through at least a handful of thorns.

What Can You Do Today?

"Do what you can, with what you have, where you are." ~ Theodore Roosevelt

A few days ago I had an interesting conversation with my mother and a friend who stopped by to see us. We were discussing good deeds, and my friend said that she loved to help others, but hardly had the time to devote herself to any kind of charity work. My mother, who doesn’t speak much English, waited for me to translate, and then simply asked her: “Do you ever leave your house?”

My friend looked a little puzzled, and replied that indeed she is always gone from dawn to dusk, running around all the time. My mother then said: “Well, then, your life is full of opportunities to help others”.

After that short conversation, we went out and I was stunned at what I had the chance to observe. We stopped by to see my husband at work, and in the parking lot I noticed an elderly lady struggling to get out of her car. I held the door for her, and helped her out of the vehicle. Right after that, I saw a delivery man who tried to open the door with arms full of stuff – opening the door was a small gesture for me, but it certainly helped him a great deal. I spent the rest of the day really observing people and situations nearby, and was astonished at the number of situations I normally would not have noticed.

We are so used to program every moment of our lives that we often overlook the opportunities that abound in the unplanned moments of our days. Regardless of what we do, where we are, who we are with, we all have the opportunity to help with something – an old lady may need help loading grocery bags in her car, a colleague at work may need help making copies, someone may need help picking up something they dropped.

No act is too small. Mother Teresa once said that a small act of kindness is indeed like a tiny drop in the ocean, but the ocean would be less without that single drop. Similarly, everything we do for others makes a difference; it may not be a difference that is readily visible, but something has been changed because of it, nonetheless.

We can start today. Let’s go out into the world and see how we can serve, merely for the sake of spreading a ray of sunshine into someone else’s corner. As we do so, we will allow that light to enter within the dark recesses of our own soul as it is impossible to shine a light for someone else and not be guided by it ourselves.

Let’s not wait until tomorrow to do something nice - let’s start today, this hour, this minute; right where we are, and toward whoever we are with in this moment. Let’s spread a word of encouragement, a smile, a single touch, or even a little spare change to someone who needs it more than we do.

No matter what we do, let’s do it without expecting anything back. What we receive from that small gesture may surprise us after all.

What Might Have Been

“It is never too late to be what you might have been.” ~ George Eliot

It is never too late. I can’t recall how many times I heard that phrase growing up. I believe it must have been my parents’ favorite thing to say, because it seemed to follow every sentence they uttered each time my sister and I worried about something.

Indeed, no matter how many mistakes one has made, or how many times things have gone wrong, or opportunities have missed their chance to manifest, luck, circumstances and attitudes can always take a sudden turn.

I once read of a lady who had always wanted to go to college, but never had the means when she was young. Being the oldest of eight children, she was, at first, too busy helping her mother raise her younger siblings; after that she married and started a family of her own.

When her husband died she was nearly seventy-five years of age, and her children had all grown and moved out. It was time for her to decide what she was going to do with the years she had left – for once in her life she had no one to be responsible for but herself. If she looked back to the days of her youth, her only regret was to not have received a college education. So she decided to make up for that.

She enrolled at the local university - although family and friends tried to discourage her plans - and for the next four years she diligently took all the credit courses she needed to graduate in business management. By the time she graduated she was seventy-nine, but she proudly posed for photos on her big day.

She was never able to put her skills to use, since she was too old for employment and died just a few weeks short of her eightieth birthday, but for almost a whole year she lived knowing she had crowned her dream of being a college graduate.

Some of our ambitions may be more modest than those of the lady who graduated, but if they are important to us they are worth pursuing. We may not achieve the full extent of our dreams, but can be creative as we try to get close to the original idea.

I’ve always believed that where there is a will there’s a way, and as long as our plans do not harm anyone on the path to being fulfilled, we shouldn’t hold back or tell ourselves it is too late. And maybe what we might have been can still become who we are.

Spirit In All

“The Light of Spirit surrounds us; the Love of Spirit enfolds us; the Power of Spirit protects us; the Presence of Spirit watches over us; Spirit wells in us. Wherever we are, Spirit is, and All Is Well.”


Not too long ago I discovered a slice of Paradise near my house. I had arrived too early to meet a friend at a local park and, since it was a beautiful day, I decided to get out of the car and take a walk. As I ventured down the trail, I saw a wooden bridge breaking off the main path, so I decided to follow it. The bridge led to a swampy area tucked behind the woods, one I never knew was there.

The sight was breathtaking. Due to heavy rains of late, the body of water appeared swollen and pregnant with life of all different types. No matter where my eyes rested, something moved – from tadpoles to insects and even a few snakes quietly soaking the warmth of the day atop of rotten logs.

I sat on the bridge and listened. The many voices blended into a primal song, interrupted only by the incessant call of a lone bird perched on a branch nearby. The air smelled earthy and slightly musty - the result of decaying wood mixed with the fragrance of new growth exploding all around.

Somehow, although I was alone, I didn’t feel that way. I lied down on the bridge and looked up toward the skyline, noticing how some of the trees had bent and were now curving toward one another, their branches and leaves eager to connect - some of them close enough to resemble hands joined in a silent prayer.

Those trees piqued my attention. For an instant I felt protected and safe, tucked away from the rest of the world and able to open my heart to the beauty of Spirit manifesting all around, if only for a brief moment.

In that flash of time I knew I was one with all there is. No hierarchy or race supremacy – big or small, young or old, in that natural setting I was no different than the beetle carefully making its way around a thorn bush.

We are taught that the human race is superior to other animals, and we are able to control our environment to fit our existence, but in reality that’s nothing more than an ego fix. Viruses defy our advanced science and morph into new forms we can’t control, and natural events have the power to wipe away human structures –Nature only allows us to cling to an illusion of control, but reserves the last word to remind us that in the end, we are just another form of creation.

I was always taught that all life matters, regardless of what it looks like. Just because we can’t see the greater picture we can’t assume we have the right to decide the worth of another aspect of creation. We are all part of the One, and the One is part of All. And that is all we need to know.

Instant Reward vs Long-Term Benefits

“Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell.” ~ Author Unknown

Yesterday I had the best time talking to my daughter and two of her little friends, as they were telling me what they want to be when they grow up. Although Princess was definitely on top of the chart, the next two hot personas on the “want to be” list were mommy and model.

That fun talk made me think about all the projects that we envision and give up because of obstacles and hardship. Are obstacles the main reason for abandoning our goals? Or could it be that instant reward often gets in the way of our allegiance to the original plan?

Humans are naturally creatures of comfort, and will choose the easy path that will cause the least amount of unease. Unless we are able to exercise a good dose of self-discipline, most of us are inclined to take the easy road and succumb to the temptation of instant reward.

Long-term benefits offer a reward which is often in our greater interest but might take months or years to solidify, while temporary satisfaction manifest immediately but is likely not what we need in the long run. When we give in to temptation we feel momentarily exhilarated, but quickly develop feelings of guilt as we feel that we have cheated ourselves. Instant reward can come in the form of indulgence or as a band-aid – regardless of which we act upon, we feel frustrated with ourselves and are more likely to give in on future occasions.

There are ways to build a stronger resolve. One of them is to set small goals for ourselves - not too far down the road - and stick with them, independently from the fires that erupt around us. We can increase the amount of time between the original plan and the reward and continue telling ourselves that it is only a temporary state of discomfort.

Everything can be overcome one step at a time, if we accept that life itself is dynamic and thus on a constant energy shift. If I was to wake up tomorrow morning and someone told me to quit smoking forever, I would find that thought overwhelming; if, instead, I was told to quit for a day, or an hour at a time, I could summon the resolve to follow through for such a short time. We can’t keep our mind focused on forever but everyone can sacrifice for one day.

Maybe, then, our long-term reward can become a much closer goal – one we can feel comfortable sticking with in preparation of bigger things to come.

Two Trash Cans at a Time

“It is a fact that in the right formation, the lifting power of many wings can achieve twice the distance of any bird flying alone.” ~Author Unknown

I love gardening. There is something very magical about watching a small plant grow and thrive, and finally bloom in an explosion of mesmerizing colors. I create a mental image of what my yard will look like before I even go to the store, and carefully pick out my plants to match the vision.

What I don’t like is getting the flower beds ready for planting. Once springtime approaches, I walk outside several times and sigh at the task ahead, often postponing weed pulling one more day. Needless to say, rain is my friend – not specifically because it softens the ground or helps the grass grow, but mostly because if it’s raining I have an excuse to postpone the work even longer.

A few days ago, my parents arrived from Italy. Those who personally know my mother also know that keeping her away from a yard in need of help is harder than keeping a child away from candy at the check-out line of the grocery store.

Today, after we spent the first few days after my parents’ arrival at home, she finally sneaked out into the yard to soak in the sunshine. And five minutes hadn’t passed before she kneeled down to pull the first weed.

It all escalated from that moment on – she called my father outside and asked him to help her out. When I walked outside with three steaming cups of coffee, both of them were deeply engrossed in the task at hand. As I stood there, I felt awkward just watching, so I finished my coffee and went to work with them.

We all worked together and filled the trash cans I normally reserve for yard waste in no time. I told my parents how much I appreciated their help, as images of a beautiful, manicured yard quickly began to race through my mind. I mentioned that we still had a lot to do, and my mom simply responded: “true, we still have more work to get done to get everything up to par, but two hours ago these two trash cans were empty. We are only in the beginning stages and it’s hard to see results now, but you can begin to imagine what it will look like once it’s finished. We are two steps closer to getting it done.”

We often give up when we don’t see tangible results, because we don’t realize that even if our goal is not fully achieved, things are still moving beneath the surface toward the realization of our hopes and dreams.

A little nudging from the outside and team work can easily motivate us to jump in and do our part. When working together it's easy to get things accomplished and realize that even some of the hardest work can be fun - moment by moment, and two trash cans at a time.

Giving Anger the Respect it Deserves

"You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist."~ Indira Gandhi

Among the plethora of emotions we juggle with on any given day, anger is the one that can indeed hold us back from reaching our potential.

We are often not entirely aware of how much anger we hold on to. Many things make us angry, and when we feel powerless to change them, our frustration drives us to feel even angrier.

We are taught since early childhood to keep our anger in check, to forgive and forget, and to let go. Yet, some things are not easy to let go of, and when someone tells is to ignore them we feel as if others are discounting the validity of our reactions.

In some cases, when the individual is not able to reestablish a good relationship with anger – and experiences guilt when honoring this feeling – the pent-up frustration simmers under the skin, and can easily erupt in an escalating pattern of violence.

It is okay to feel angry. What is not okay is to hold back our feelings without having an outlet and allow them to putrefy under the surface. If not released, anger leads to depression and illness. When we give ourselves permission to feel anger, we are able to honor the validity of our feelings and let the blocks go in a healthy way.

Several years ago, I read a book which suggested thinking about the very things that make us angry; when anger is finally able to rise, we should allow it to spread through every cell of our being and focus on feeling its effects without pushing it away. Once the feeling is fully summoned we should then tell ourselves that we honor our anger as a valid response to the situation that triggered it. Then we should tell ourselves – out loud – that it is time to let it go.

Feelings will not go away until properly acknowledged for the purpose they have served. Anger itself is, sometimes, the fuel necessary to cross through a difficult situation, and its task is an honorable one; thus, it should never be ignored – no feeling should.

It is often difficult to express our anger in our workplace or around people we care about, but never addressing the feelings that have built-up is a sure path toward creating resentment for the people that caused us to be angry. If, for any reason, we are not able to respectfully express our feelings to the person that caused us to feel angry – or to appropriately “feel” our anger in the environs we find ourselves in, we must “bookmark” the feeling, and address it later on when we can do so privately.

When we recognize our anger it loses its significance, and can be prevented from consuming us. Being able to address all of our feelings allows the power to move on from a difficult situation and create a better reality.

We wouldn’t want to forget being joyous – anger is only the other side of the same coin.

The Power of a Single Pebble

“Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.” ~Mother Teresa

James W. Foley once said that if you throw a small pebble in the water it will disappear out of sight as soon as it breaks the surface, yet the ripples it creates will continue to spread outward from the center. You can disturb a mighty river just by dropping in a stone.

If you drop an unkind word, it disappears quickly, but its impact will create ripples nobody had expected. Once they begin to spread it is almost impossible to stop them. You can disturb a life that was happy just by dropping an unkind word.

If you drop a word of kindness or cheer, it will also disappear in a flash, but the ripples that spread from the center will continue to grow, and soon you will be amazed at the power of such a simple word.

Since I was little, my mother made it a big deal to properly teach me how important words are. “Words have power” she often said, and she diligently corrected my sister and I each time we said anything unkind to someone. In her opinion, apologies are nothing more than a band-aid over a bullet wound – why not think ahead and prevent the shooting rather than using the same energy to stop the bleeding?

In so many ways, hurtful words can be one of the worst weapons known to mankind, as a broken person is easy to manipulate and control. Similarly, words can enable a love affair between an individual and the rest of the world, if the gift of expression is used to empower and enlighten others.

We can’t expect a domino effect of love and kindness unless we become a part of that change ourselves. Every drop added to a bottle counts toward the bottle getting filled – we can’t control the actions of others, but we are certainly in charge of the differences WE can make.

We can make a conscious choice of shifting the currents today, by committing to ONE act of random kindness. Imagine if each person in this world was to do that today – the energy of all the seemingly unimportant acts of kindness would come together to create an overwhelming and powerful change.

We all can do something. We all can make a difference, regardless of our social status, financial availability or state of existence. And it all starts with throwing a pebble of kindness into the waters of life.

The Mouse and The Trap

One day, a mouse saw that a farmer and his wife had just put out some mouse traps. In a panic, he ran out into the farm yard and told the other animals of the predicament he and his family were in.

The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, "Mr. Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me; I cannot be bothered by it." The mouse turned to the pig, hoping he would receive greater sympathy, but to his dismay, although they had shared meals and fun in the past, seemed uninterested in his story. "I am so very sorry Mr. Mouse," said the pig, "unfortunately there is nothing I can do about it but pray; be assured that you are in my prayers." The mouse, amazed at the lack of concern among his friends, told the cow, but she replied: "Mr. Mouse, a mouse trap is no danger to me."

So the mouse returned to the house, head down and feeling alone. That very night a sound was heard throughout the house - a mousetrap catching its prey. The farmer's wife rushed to see what was caught. In the darkness, she did not see that it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught. The snake bit the farmer's wife. The farmer rushed her to the hospital. She returned home with a fever.

Now everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup's main ingredient. His wife's sickness continued so that friends and neighbors came to sit with her around the clock. To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig. The farmer's wife did not get well, in fact, she died, and so many people came for her funeral the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide meat for all of them to eat.

So the next time you hear that someone is facing a problem and think that it does not concern you, remember that when the least of us is threatened, we are all at risk. We go through our days without realizing we are connected – directly or indirectly – to all there is, but the tragedies befalling anyone have the power to create a domino effect that will touch many lives including our own. The larger animals in the story could not be harmed by a tiny mouse trap, but the ripple effects affected them nonetheless.

Regardless of how distant a predicament appears to be, we should never assume we are completely shielded from its reach, as the boundaries we have created could easily fall and leave us vulnerable.

Life is no different than a birthday party – it is wonderful to enjoy our new toys but we would have no fun celebrating alone.